Writing: My Passions and Fears

I’ve been passionate about writing since I was a teenager. I wrote many poems in high school. I had notebooks filled with poems. After graduating high school, I began writing stories. I’d spend hours a day just writing or thinking about writing. It was peaceful to me.

A few years after I’d graduated high school, the guy I was seeing at the time got it in his head I was cheating on him. In retaliation, he destroyed my writing as well as showed me how angry he was with me. He never apologized for his actions even after it became very apparent I was innocent. This caused me to lose my passion for writing significantly.

I spent years repressing my urges to write. And in some ways, I think it tainted my writing. I wouldn’t say I’m very talented in writing, but it’s something I love doing. I also can’t say that I just have urges to write. Well, I do, but they aren’t frequent.

In 2015, I participated in my first ever #NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). I wrote my first actual novel, Spirit Rising. It’s unpublished. I really need to rewrite and add to it. I was very proud of myself. I was finally writing again! I haven’t won another Nano project, but I’m not giving up.

I really am putting more and more consideration into giving in and publishing. I don’t expect to become a best selling author. And that’s fine. Just having my work out there will be enough for me. I know many people are afraid of failing when it comes to this. I get that fear. It’s something we will never know until we try.

What I’m afraid of is losing my time reading if I become a published author. It seems like the pressure to publish so many books a year is really common. My obviously solution for this would be to publish a book a year anyways. I know it won’t make me rich, but that’s seriously fine. I’m as passionate about reading as I am writing. Not being able to read books and review them would make me very uncomfortable.

I also strongly feel that I could use some writing classes. Maybe some editing classes too. My idea and concepts are great in my eyes, but the execution lacks grace and style. It’s definitely something I plan to look into. Until then, I’ll share my writings and my thoughts on writing here every Monday. I sincerely hope you enjoy!

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